2019 06 09
Cutting up in my kitchen
Fine, I'll admit it. Todrick's new song is doing everything for me.
I also tried putting in my eyebrow piercings again, and those holes were nowhere to be
found... which is giving me all of the ammunition I need to royally fuck my eyebrows
up in some way, shape, or form. I could live my '90s Pamela Anderson pencil-thin eyebrow fantasy.
Or just go eyebrow-less. The possibilities are endless.
2019 06 08
I knew very shortly after I got my eyebrow pierced twice in one sitting that
something was not quite right. The long bit (needle?) of the curved barbell was
far too short for the amount of skin the needle had gone through. She had put in
a 10mm, and I need at least a 12mm, preferably a 14mm.
So the wounds were in a constant state of scabbing for a few months as the skin was
pressed to the point it couldn't heal. I then changed them out after a few months
for longer ones, it got infected, I sorted the infection out, and then had to deal
with minimising the scar tissue that had formed.
Things are alright at this point. Scars are fading okay. Until I get home from the
She Past Away concert last night. I was sat in my living room after having peeled off
my vinyl pants and was about to grab something to eat.
I suddenly feel this strong pressure against my eyelid and freak the fuck out. I head
to the bathroom and look in the mirror and my eyebrow has just full on swollen up.
I went to a walk-in clinic early today and the nurse said it's likely just allergies
rather than anything mental, so I bought some cheap antihistamines and it's calmed down
a lot. I took my piercings out because I just did not have the time to deal with them.
Okay, I have 4 very distinct pink circles where the piercings were, but they'll fade over
Once the swelling has completely gone I'll try sticking the piercings back in. If the holes
haven't closed up it will be business as usual and I'll pretend this never happened.
2019 06 05
Not working on my own site. Again.
I've decided to take on a big beast of a project -- in the form of recreating every
accessible website in Grand Theft Auto IV, and store them on one Neocities website.
I have already ported the illustrious beverage Sprunk over at, well,
sprunk.neocities.org, but I've gotten
the itch and want to do the rest of them.
I snapped up the URL
grandtheftinternet where this project
will materialise at some point.
I'm also binning off my whatisthematrix site as frankly, I couldn't give a shit about
working on it. I think this GTA project is gonna be far more interesting for me.
2019 06 02
Recovering from carpal tunnel
I am ditching my smartphone when my contract ends in a few weeks. I will very much miss
the convenience of having one, but I can't continue to use one in good conscience.
Of course, the mobile browser I use is loaded up with the privacy extensions I use on my PC and
I always use a VPN. You know, the basics. But it's the tip of the iceberg when it comes to
data farming and whatnot. Why should it matter? I don't use social media (apart from Twitter,
but it's not like I've got much personally-identifiable info on there) so that's a big chunk
that's not attributed to me. I just don't like the idea of not having control over my own
data. I just want to be here and mind my own business! Clearly I ask for too much!
The focal point of this is that I'm shifting services I would normally only use on my phone
to my PC. The big one is Bandsintown, an app I use to get notifications when somebody is touring.
To use the PC version of the site, you need to have a Facebook account.
Obviously that wasn't
going to happen, so I thought I'd set up a Songkick account instead. I only had to manually
'follow' 379 artists... I just hope this website doesn't fail me.
2019 06 01
Well, the season 11 finale of Drag Race was... okay.
That final lip sync between Yvie Oddly and Brooke Lynn Hytes felt like watching the
lip sync between Latrice Royale and Kenya Michaels all over again. I genuinely
cannot believe there's people out there that think that Brooke should've gotten the
crown, or that there could have even been (another) double crowning.
I think I now understand the heated emotions that straight men feel watching sports.
2019 05 23
Invest in a sewing machine/hot glue gun, STAT
I've just had the million dollar idea of having Juicy Couture-like pants, but instead of
'JUICY' on the arse, it says 'POWERED BY SUPER EUROBEAT'.
I'm about to spearhead the Juicy Couture tracksuit revival. Watch this space.
2019 05 22
I feel like my entire software development 'career' thus far can be summarised
by these two pictures.
As if I spent a solid 2 hours trying to debug a SQL stored procedure, only to find out
that the reason it was occasionally failing was NOT a concurrency issue like I thought
it was. You know what the core issue was? A missing DISTINCT.
I'm still pissed about it.
2019 05 21
Start a one-man riot in the nearest Costco
We're a year late on this. I'm keeping track and I'm not happy.
2019 05 20
Annihilate a drunken salaryman
Scored this little beauty. Shipping + customs cost about the same as the shirt itself
but this was a scoop I couldn't pass up. It's probably from around 1999, as that's
when 双生児-GEMINI- was released.
This shirt also looks and smells like it's been in an attic for 20 years, which adds to my
theory. Thinking I might give it a little wash before I wear it.
In what is possibly the most ambitious crossover event in history, this shirt immediately
made me think of Angelina's cross tattoo.
2019 05 19
Be the sexiest bitch in Pleasantview
A 12GB torrent just finished for The Sims 2 with all of its expansion packs. I played the PS2 version
tonnes when I was younger, but never gave the PC version a whirl. I have sunk many, many hours into
The Sims 3 but I'm looking for something a little different.
My only experience with The Sims 2 is seeing
a music video someone made in it for Godhead's cover
of Eleanor Rigby (which is mint, if I can add).
2019 05 18
I'm wrestling hard with myself to not tear down this site and rebuild it from the ground up. My good
friend Human Raccoon talked me out that shit last night.
I think I need to work on taming my impulsive streak a bit. It worked out alright when I binned most
of my social media and email accounts in one hit, or when I changed my legal name, but I feel like it'll
bite me in the arse one day.
After spending some time (5 minutes) thinking on it, I think I've got a good idea of how I want things
to look. I only need to run 200+ photos through Photoshop.
2019 05 16
Perform an exorcism in the desert
Nothing quite comes close to the dungeon synthpop shaman shit Mortiis had going on back in
2001. People shit themselves over his Era I stuff and constantly decry his Era III/0 work as
being 'crap' (which it's not... I'm just saying).
But little do people speak of Era II! The Smell of Rain. An absolutely glorious album. The comments
on Era II songs are usually "where's my dungeon music" or "this is embarrassing" but the truth of
the matter is that people can't appreciate campy witch doctor music when they hear it, and that's the
bottom line. Stone Cold didn't say so, but I did.
2019 05 15
Plant the Da Vinci virus on a client
At work, one of our most annoying clients raised a case because they found an issue on
one of their pages, which is fair enough. I'll let them off, I guess.
When investigating this, this page ended up using really old
code that got fucked up because it relied on pages even older that were deprecated years ago.
After some hacking around on my dev site I managed to come up with a crappy fix that would resolve
the issue, but would never be something we'd put into master code. Time to jump onto the client's site.
It took me an hour on the phone with helpdesk to hotfix them properly after their case had been sitting
in the backlog for a bit, but eventually it's finished and working.
The client's response which got fed back through customer care?
"It's fixed [name]. It only took you this long to fix a simple UI issue. Pat yourselves on the back for a job
Oh aye. Fixing the code in one page and checking another 20+ pages to make sure shit
was in sync. A simple UI issue. Suck my dick. I fucking hate clients. Immensely.
2019 05 13
Book a hotel on company time
Most people do something really special for their 21st birthday. A lot of people I know
had large parties, or they got a car, or they got engaged (don't fucking ask).
I had no concrete plans for mine until I found out that God Module are doing a few UK shows
in July, with one of them falling on my birthday.
I thought I'd treat myself by actually booking a hotel room for me to crash in after the show
rather than staying in a hostel (or a train station) for the night. Okay, maybe it's not the
most luxurious 21st anyone's ever heard of, but I'm looking forward to it nonetheless. It's not
like anyone I know would want to do anything for my 21st so I'm gonna go out and do fun shit by